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   The Merchant of Venice
ACT I SCENE II Belmont. A room in PORTIA'S house. 
 Enter PORTIA and NERISSA 
PORTIA By my troth, Nerissa, my little body is aweary of 
 this great world. 
NERISSA You would be, sweet madam, if your miseries were in 
 the same abundance as your good fortunes are: and 
 yet, for aught I see, they are as sick that surfeit 5
 with too much as they that starve with nothing. It 
 is no mean happiness therefore, to be seated in the 
 mean: superfluity comes sooner by white hairs, but 
 competency lives longer. 
PORTIA Good sentences and well pronounced. 10
NERISSA They would be better, if well followed. 
PORTIA If to do were as easy as to know what were good to 
 do, chapels had been churches and poor men's 
 cottages princes' palaces. It is a good divine that 
 follows his own instructions: I can easier teach 15
 twenty what were good to be done, than be one of the 
 twenty to follow mine own teaching. The brain may 
 devise laws for the blood, but a hot temper leaps 
 o'er a cold decree: such a hare is madness the 
 youth, to skip o'er the meshes of good counsel the 20
 cripple. But this reasoning is not in the fashion to 
 choose me a husband. O me, the word 'choose!' I may 
 neither choose whom I would nor refuse whom I 
 dislike; so is the will of a living daughter curbed 
 by the will of a dead father. Is it not hard, 25
 Nerissa, that I cannot choose one nor refuse none? 
NERISSA Your father was ever virtuous; and holy men at their 
 death have good inspirations: therefore the lottery, 
 that he hath devised in these three chests of gold, 
 silver and lead, whereof who chooses his meaning 30
 chooses you, will, no doubt, never be chosen by any 
 rightly but one who shall rightly love. But what 
 warmth is there in your affection towards any of 
 these princely suitors that are already come? 
PORTIA I pray thee, over-name them; and as thou namest 35
 them, I will describe them; and, according to my 
 description, level at my affection. 
NERISSA First, there is the Neapolitan prince. 
PORTIA Ay, that's a colt indeed, for he doth nothing but 
 talk of his horse; and he makes it a great 40
 appropriation to his own good parts, that he can 
 shoe him himself. I am much afeard my lady his 
 mother played false with a smith. 
NERISSA Then there is the County Palatine. 
PORTIA He doth nothing but frown, as who should say 'If you 45
 will not have me, choose:' he hears merry tales and 
 smiles not: I fear he will prove the weeping 
 philosopher when he grows old, being so full of 
 unmannerly sadness in his youth. I had rather be 
 married to a death's-head with a bone in his mouth 50
 than to either of these. God defend me from these 
 two! 
NERISSA How say you by the French lord, Monsieur Le Bon? 
PORTIA God made him, and therefore let him pass for a man. 
 In truth, I know it is a sin to be a mocker: but, 55
 he! why, he hath a horse better than the 
 Neapolitan's, a better bad habit of frowning than 
 the Count Palatine; he is every man in no man; if a 
 throstle sing, he falls straight a capering: he will 
 fence with his own shadow: if I should marry him, I 60
 should marry twenty husbands. If he would despise me 
 I would forgive him, for if he love me to madness, I 
 shall never requite him. 
NERISSA What say you, then, to Falconbridge, the young baron 
 of England? 65
PORTIA You know I say nothing to him, for he understands 
 not me, nor I him: he hath neither Latin, French, 
 nor Italian, and you will come into the court and 
 swear that I have a poor pennyworth in the English. 
 He is a proper man's picture, but, alas, who can 70
 converse with a dumb-show? How oddly he is suited! 
 I think he bought his doublet in Italy, his round 
 hose in France, his bonnet in Germany and his 
 behavior every where. 
NERISSA What think you of the Scottish lord, his neighbour? 75
PORTIA That he hath a neighbourly charity in him, for he 
 borrowed a box of the ear of the Englishman and 
 swore he would pay him again when he was able: I 
 think the Frenchman became his surety and sealed 
 under for another. 80
NERISSA How like you the young German, the Duke of Saxony's nephew? 
PORTIA Very vilely in the morning, when he is sober, and 
 most vilely in the afternoon, when he is drunk: when 
 he is best, he is a little worse than a man, and 
 when he is worst, he is little better than a beast: 85
 and the worst fall that ever fell, I hope I shall 
 make shift to go without him. 
NERISSA If he should offer to choose, and choose the right 
 casket, you should refuse to perform your father's 
 will, if you should refuse to accept him. 90
PORTIA Therefore, for fear of the worst, I pray thee, set a 
 deep glass of rhenish wine on the contrary casket, 
 for if the devil be within and that temptation 
 without, I know he will choose it. I will do any 
 thing, Nerissa, ere I'll be married to a sponge. 95
NERISSA You need not fear, lady, the having any of these 
 lords: they have acquainted me with their 
 determinations; which is, indeed, to return to their 
 home and to trouble you with no more suit, unless 
 you may be won by some other sort than your father's 100
 imposition depending on the caskets. 
PORTIA If I live to be as old as Sibylla, I will die as 
 chaste as Diana, unless I be obtained by the manner 
 of my father's will. I am glad this parcel of wooers 
 are so reasonable, for there is not one among them 105
 but I dote on his very absence, and I pray God grant 
 them a fair departure. 
NERISSA Do you not remember, lady, in your father's time, a 
 Venetian, a scholar and a soldier, that came hither 
 in company of the Marquis of Montferrat? 110
PORTIA Yes, yes, it was Bassanio; as I think, he was so called. 
NERISSA True, madam: he, of all the men that ever my foolish 
 eyes looked upon, was the best deserving a fair lady. 
PORTIA I remember him well, and I remember him worthy of 
 thy praise. 115
 Enter a Serving-man 
 How now! what news? 
Servant The four strangers seek for you, madam, to take 
 their leave: and there is a forerunner come from a 
 fifth, the Prince of Morocco, who brings word the 
 prince his master will be here to-night. 120
PORTIA If I could bid the fifth welcome with so good a 
 heart as I can bid the other four farewell, I should 
 be glad of his approach: if he have the condition 
 of a saint and the complexion of a devil, I had 
 rather he should shrive me than wive me. Come, 125
 Nerissa. Sirrah, go before. 
 Whiles we shut the gates 
 upon one wooer, another knocks at the door. 
 Exeunt 


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